Signs of Attachment Issues | International Dating Advice

International dating is one of the go-to options for people who are tired of looking for love in their locality. The reason for that is there are too many similarities, including the culture and set of traditions one grew up with. For some, it can be boring. The majority of those who try their hand at international dating want to experience new adventures.

Let’s talk about the reality of international dating -- we can’t guarantee that everything will be perfect. We define perfection as a whole, but in fact, once we have found our significant other, we tend to look through their imperfections.

We are all unique and we all have different kinds of attachments, depending on the person. Studies show that there are different types of attachment issues. It can be triggered through a history of trauma, like abuse, neglect, or the loss of a loved one.

According to the attachment theory, it refers to an affectional bond or tie between an individual and an attachment figure. It involves the way you form intimate and emotional bonds with others.

Types of Attachment Issues

• Secure attachment
• Insecure attachment, which is subcategorized by;
  • Anxious / Preoccupied
  • Dismissive Avoidant
  • Fearful Avoidant

Here are some signs of attachment issues you need to look out for when you start dating someone internationally:

1. Difficulty forming emotional bonds with others.

Those who have difficulty forming social and emotional connections with others are known to have attachment disorder. This means that they have a hard time building meaningful relationships with others.

Signs may also include a person having anger problems, impulsivity, or resistance to receiving love. They are unable to show affection and maintain significant relationships, both romantic and platonic. They withdraw from connections and detach themselves from reality.

2. Limited experience of positive emotions.

When positive emotions lead us to new possibilities, we are able to learn and build on our skills more. However, if you have limited experiences, you are limiting yourself to many wonderful possibilities. Life can become tough as you go further and move forward.

3. Difficulty with physical or emotional closeness or boundaries.

Obviously, when someone has attachment issues, they will want to have secure attachments with their significant other. It can also sometimes be referred to as intimacy avoidance or avoidance anxiety.

It’s basically a fear of sharing a close emotional or physical relationship. People who experience this don’t usually wish to avoid intimacy. On the contrary, they may even long for closeness but frequently push others away or even sabotage relationships.

4. Anxiety.

Anxiety is a normal and often healthy emotion. However, when a person regularly feels disproportionate levels of anxiety, it might become a medical disorder.

Anxiety has become a major problem within the general population. When a person has attachment issues, it’s no surprise that their mental health is affected by fear, nervousness, apprehension, and worry.

5. Mood changes.

In many cases, shifts in mood are a symptom of a more serious health issue. They can occur due to mental health conditions, hormonal changes, or substance abuse, among other things.

It’s dangerous because it can affect everyone around you. You may start losing everybody in your circle. Sometimes, the expression of emotions in particular ways can lead to miscommunication and unspoken expectations.

While emotions are an essential part of a relationship, there’s something else that can affect the tone of the interactions between you and your significant other. Moods are more than emotions. Sometimes, moods catch us by surprise, and they almost always seem to happen out of nowhere.

6. Intense reactions to changes in routine.

A person who is experiencing attachment issues is the type that seeks comfort all the time. They tend to do things that are within their comfort zones.

Like clockwork, everything is in disarray if they don’t go according to plan. Changes in routine make them uncomfortable and they find it hard to deal with, and as a result, they tend to struggle to move forward with their lives.

7. Engaging in high-risk behaviors.

Sometimes, you can’t deny that a person with attachment issues has a risk factor involved. It can be in the form of drugs or emotional and physical abuse. They are often impulsive and damaging, which can subsequently lead to disability, death, or social problems.

8. Behavioral difficulties or unpredictable behavior.

“Who is this person and what have they done to my significant other?”

Yes, sometimes your partner’s behavior can be surprising. This may be due to a life event or family situation that has affected their mood and personality, resulting in behavior problems. Other than that, there will be changes in appetite, procrastination, and avoidance of responsibilities.

Similar to high-risk behaviors, there may also be an increase in the use of alcohol, drugs, or cigarettes. Some may exhibit unpredictable behaviors such as scratching, nail biting, fidgeting, and pacing.

9. Relationship problems.

Sometimes a person can get delusional, especially those who are vulnerable and sensitive to misunderstanding hookup sites as an opportunity to find real, long-lasting relationships. We can’t blame them for having relationship problems in the past.

They might need a true loving partner who is willing to accept them for who they are and prove to them that not all people are the same.

10. Poor self-image and self-hatred.

While there are times when we all dislike who we are, loathing our own thoughts and actions is a classic sign of low self-esteem.

Self-hate is characterized by feelings of anger and frustration about who we are and an inability to forgive ourselves for even the smallest mistakes. This kind of person doesn’t give value to themselves, or thinks that they are undeserving of the good things in life.

How to Help a Person with Attachment Issues

The strategy for creating an earned secure attachment style involves reconciling past experiences and making sense of the impact a person’s past has on their present and future.

A healthy relationship is one where partners are mutually caring, supportive, respectful, and loving towards one another. These characteristics can help shift them away from feeling negative about themselves.

Yes, there are a lot of dating sites for singles out there, but let’s not talk about which dating site is best for serious relationships. In the end, what matters is how you establish security for a person after a lifetime of insecure attachment patterns.

International dating comes with risks and vulnerabilities, but an earned secure attachment can forever change your life and your relationships for the better.